Thursday, October 11, 2012
Beer History I - The Never-ending Beer!
"Don’t drink the water, drink beer'" - St. Arnou, the patron saint of brewing.
Here is the story of a miracle involving beer (isn't beer a miracle in itself??). I will not bore you with a self-review of my beer (for one day at least), proving that this blog is multi-dimensional, whatever that means.
St Arnou was born in 580 AD to a prominent Austrian family. History resounds with his roguish ex
Here is the story of a miracle involving beer (isn't beer a miracle in itself??). I will not bore you with a self-review of my beer (for one day at least), proving that this blog is multi-dimensional, whatever that means.
St Arnou was born in 580 AD to a prominent Austrian family. History resounds with his roguish ex
ploits in the armies of Rome.
Upon his triumphant return home, he became a man of peace and faith, converted to the cloth and was promptly declared Bishop of Metz, where he dutifully advised his congregation against drinking the unclean town water. Arnou warned 'don’t drink the water, drink beer'.
He later retired and moved to a monastery where he died on 16th August 640 AD. One year later, after the citizens of Metz requested that their Bishop’s relics be returned to their town, he was ceremoniously returned home.
It was during this voyage that a stunning miracle occurred at a town called Champignuelles. When the tired porters stopped for a rest, they realised mournfully that there was only one mug of beer to be shared. As this was clearly not enough, one of the men uttered a desperate plea to God for more beer. Miraculously, that single mug of beer never ran dry. Arnold of Metz was promptly declared St Arnou, the Patron Saint of Brewing.
Hallelujah!
Upon his triumphant return home, he became a man of peace and faith, converted to the cloth and was promptly declared Bishop of Metz, where he dutifully advised his congregation against drinking the unclean town water. Arnou warned 'don’t drink the water, drink beer'.
He later retired and moved to a monastery where he died on 16th August 640 AD. One year later, after the citizens of Metz requested that their Bishop’s relics be returned to their town, he was ceremoniously returned home.
It was during this voyage that a stunning miracle occurred at a town called Champignuelles. When the tired porters stopped for a rest, they realised mournfully that there was only one mug of beer to be shared. As this was clearly not enough, one of the men uttered a desperate plea to God for more beer. Miraculously, that single mug of beer never ran dry. Arnold of Metz was promptly declared St Arnou, the Patron Saint of Brewing.
Hallelujah!
Retro Review I - Hoegaarden Copy aka "Orange Beer"
"Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me"
- Winston Churchill.
Amen, brother. Of course, there's less to take out of me, but i've certainly taken a lot out of alcohol over the years.
That brings me to....
Orange beer.
Many years ago, in my brewing naivety, i thought i'd make a copy of the famous and fabulous Hoegaarden Witbier. I simply found th
- Winston Churchill.
Amen, brother. Of course, there's less to take out of me, but i've certainly taken a lot out of alcohol over the years.
That brings me to....
Orange beer.
Many years ago, in my brewing naivety, i thought i'd make a copy of the famous and fabulous Hoegaarden Witbier. I simply found th
e secret ingredients and presto! Orange beer! Oh, wait...
But witbier means white beer, so why is mine orange? Well you see, the secret ingredients are coriander seed and a particular type of orange peel, presumably found in Belgium. Bleh, as if there's a difference!
Okay, so i bought a pack of coriander seeds, but thought there was too many. I also grated some orange peel, you know, the navel variety (as opposed to the naval variety, whatever they are), but found it difficult to measure. Bugger it. Too much cannot be enough. Besides, it's hard to weigh because it's so damned light, and in any case bathroom scales barely can tell the difference between 0kg and 1kg, not that i can remember, 236,000 beers hence what method i used to weigh the orange gratings.
To make matters worse, i didn't have any belgian wheat malt handy, so i bought some Coopers wheat malt instead, which, apart from being about 20 shades darker, was precisely the same, only different. Once, on a different beer, i cultured some yeast from some Hoegaardens, and the beer tasted much like the real thing, but from memory, this time i didn't make enough so i added some other, non-Hoegaarden yeast, completing the farce.
Anyway, in my delusion, i waited a few weeks in anticipation of a homemade Hoegaarden, for a fraction of the price!
Come the big day, i stick a bottle of the god nectar in the fridge, wait until it gets sufficiently cold, and perform the big opening...
Pouring the magic brew, i notice the faint hint of orange, distinguishing itself from the intended beer by not only the shade, but in a colour that has probably never seen the light of day in a beer before - orange.
Ignoring the toxic colour, i swirl the beer around the glass, savouring the delicate aroma. Orange, with a hint of beer. It smells like an orchard. But is it american navel orange or australian? Is it beer or is it satan's spew? Only a daring taste of the frothing menace will put this question of the ages to bed.
Putting the fine brew to my lips, i swirl the beer around the inside of my mouth. Frothy, tick. cold, tick. Taste? Citrus central. Beer with vitamin C, yeah! Okay, so it's a little bit orange, but what's wrong with that? Oranges are good for you, right? Yeah, that's why we drink beer, because we are health nuts. "Excuse me, darling, i have a few bottles of beer to sacrifice for the good of my health, and, quite frankly, for the greater good of humanity". She's buying it, although the grimace of neglect and divided loyalties on my part could conceivably suggest otherwise.
All in all, the beer was quite drinkable, even if a tad "orchardy". Still, what was intended to be a foray into fine brewing turned into a foray into fruit beer - an oxymoron if ever there was one.
And thus it was - the folly of a mad brewer, where the witches brew of guesswork and ignorance produced a wondrous product of unrecognisable taste and assaults on the senses.
So remember, do what i say, not what i do.
But witbier means white beer, so why is mine orange? Well you see, the secret ingredients are coriander seed and a particular type of orange peel, presumably found in Belgium. Bleh, as if there's a difference!
Okay, so i bought a pack of coriander seeds, but thought there was too many. I also grated some orange peel, you know, the navel variety (as opposed to the naval variety, whatever they are), but found it difficult to measure. Bugger it. Too much cannot be enough. Besides, it's hard to weigh because it's so damned light, and in any case bathroom scales barely can tell the difference between 0kg and 1kg, not that i can remember, 236,000 beers hence what method i used to weigh the orange gratings.
To make matters worse, i didn't have any belgian wheat malt handy, so i bought some Coopers wheat malt instead, which, apart from being about 20 shades darker, was precisely the same, only different. Once, on a different beer, i cultured some yeast from some Hoegaardens, and the beer tasted much like the real thing, but from memory, this time i didn't make enough so i added some other, non-Hoegaarden yeast, completing the farce.
Anyway, in my delusion, i waited a few weeks in anticipation of a homemade Hoegaarden, for a fraction of the price!
Come the big day, i stick a bottle of the god nectar in the fridge, wait until it gets sufficiently cold, and perform the big opening...
Pouring the magic brew, i notice the faint hint of orange, distinguishing itself from the intended beer by not only the shade, but in a colour that has probably never seen the light of day in a beer before - orange.
Ignoring the toxic colour, i swirl the beer around the glass, savouring the delicate aroma. Orange, with a hint of beer. It smells like an orchard. But is it american navel orange or australian? Is it beer or is it satan's spew? Only a daring taste of the frothing menace will put this question of the ages to bed.
Putting the fine brew to my lips, i swirl the beer around the inside of my mouth. Frothy, tick. cold, tick. Taste? Citrus central. Beer with vitamin C, yeah! Okay, so it's a little bit orange, but what's wrong with that? Oranges are good for you, right? Yeah, that's why we drink beer, because we are health nuts. "Excuse me, darling, i have a few bottles of beer to sacrifice for the good of my health, and, quite frankly, for the greater good of humanity". She's buying it, although the grimace of neglect and divided loyalties on my part could conceivably suggest otherwise.
All in all, the beer was quite drinkable, even if a tad "orchardy". Still, what was intended to be a foray into fine brewing turned into a foray into fruit beer - an oxymoron if ever there was one.
And thus it was - the folly of a mad brewer, where the witches brew of guesswork and ignorance produced a wondrous product of unrecognisable taste and assaults on the senses.
So remember, do what i say, not what i do.
Tooheys Lager Homebrew Update
Checked my latest brew earlier this evening - Tooheys Lager with safale US-05 yeast. Fermentation almost finished. Tastes clean and crisp. Seriously, it should taste like crap being flat, at room temperature, and immature, but the fact that it wasn't means that it should be a cracking session (read drunkathon) beer!
Should be ready to bottle on the weekend, and ready to drink a month later. B
Should be ready to bottle on the weekend, and ready to drink a month later. B
ut don't take my word for it - come and try some for yourself!
In keeping with the KISS principle, i did nothing more than add a good yeast to enhance the flavour and aftertaste of the beer.
Ingredients: 1.7kg Tooheys Lager kit (liquid malt with hops) + 1kg Coopers Brew enhancer 1 (dextrose & maltodextrin) + US-05 Safale yeast.
I thought i'd try a bottom of the range home brew kit ($10.99 from Supabarn!) and see if my crazy old uncle Vic was right about Tooheys making decent home brew kits (yes, that would be your old man, Deano). I'd heard all the stories from the brewery and wasn't sure what i was in for, but at first taste i am impressed. The funny thing is that there is more malt in their kits than they have in their commercial beers, and they're cheaper.
My beers are much more consistent since i moved here with its underground garage and constant temperatures, as opposed to my "let the weather make my beer" days of sunny Woy Woy, with the fermenter partially outdoors and covered in a wet towel in a vain attempt to keep it cool. September is a superb time to make beer, with this brew fermenting constantly between 18 and 21 degrees, optimising its taste and avoiding the weird flavours that higher temperatures can create.
If you are not a drinker, then i may have lost you by now, but if not, grab a beer and soon you will no longer care! I have made this chore easier by sharing a Mangrove Jack's Pilsner (homemade of course) with Claude, my brother-in-law while i slur on about my fabulous blog and its indecipherable mutterings, not that he could any longer comprehend what i was waffling on about. Mmmm.....waffles!
Goodnight from DHB! Beer review to follow tomorrow - Orange beer or "how to screw up a great beer in 3 easy steps" or maybe that delicious pilsner i tried earlier. Who knows? With beer-enhanced beer blog lottery, it could be any outcome, just like my beer....
In keeping with the KISS principle, i did nothing more than add a good yeast to enhance the flavour and aftertaste of the beer.
Ingredients: 1.7kg Tooheys Lager kit (liquid malt with hops) + 1kg Coopers Brew enhancer 1 (dextrose & maltodextrin) + US-05 Safale yeast.
I thought i'd try a bottom of the range home brew kit ($10.99 from Supabarn!) and see if my crazy old uncle Vic was right about Tooheys making decent home brew kits (yes, that would be your old man, Deano). I'd heard all the stories from the brewery and wasn't sure what i was in for, but at first taste i am impressed. The funny thing is that there is more malt in their kits than they have in their commercial beers, and they're cheaper.
My beers are much more consistent since i moved here with its underground garage and constant temperatures, as opposed to my "let the weather make my beer" days of sunny Woy Woy, with the fermenter partially outdoors and covered in a wet towel in a vain attempt to keep it cool. September is a superb time to make beer, with this brew fermenting constantly between 18 and 21 degrees, optimising its taste and avoiding the weird flavours that higher temperatures can create.
If you are not a drinker, then i may have lost you by now, but if not, grab a beer and soon you will no longer care! I have made this chore easier by sharing a Mangrove Jack's Pilsner (homemade of course) with Claude, my brother-in-law while i slur on about my fabulous blog and its indecipherable mutterings, not that he could any longer comprehend what i was waffling on about. Mmmm.....waffles!
Goodnight from DHB! Beer review to follow tomorrow - Orange beer or "how to screw up a great beer in 3 easy steps" or maybe that delicious pilsner i tried earlier. Who knows? With beer-enhanced beer blog lottery, it could be any outcome, just like my beer....
Introduction to Dave's Homemade Beer Blog aka "The Beer Whisperer"
What is it that makes great beer? Is it the label? The advertisements of elvis costumes, blokes running around in the desert or man-sweat? The size of the marketing behind it or the level of drunkenness in the brainstorming session?
Or is it the yeast, hops, malt and water? Ingredients, you say? You're joking, right?
I don't kid myself of being a master brewer or anything like that, or even
Or is it the yeast, hops, malt and water? Ingredients, you say? You're joking, right?
I don't kid myself of being a master brewer or anything like that, or even
a wannabe drunken apprentice. After many years of making my own beer, with all its successes and failures (who would think that one could use too much orange peel in beer? Go figure), i thought it time to share my experiences, so others can learn from my considerable catalogue of mistakes.
What ultimately dawned on me was that the quality of the beer is due in most part to the quality of its ingredients. That home brewed beer is much cheaper than the swill, er, commercial varieties, makes the idea of using premium ingredients all the more attractive. Of course, the cleanliness, the care and the temperature are all vitally important, but you still can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear (who was the fool who tried that?).
And of course, KISS: keep it simple, stupid! (refer to Exhibit A - the aforementioned orange beer).
Of course, i realised that i could not compete with the extreme brewers, but who wants to grow their own barley? I've tried semi-mash brewing, but to my chagrin i've found that it simply represents more opportunity to screw things up. Sure, it can make your beer fresher, but for a lot more work. The simple fact is, a lot of home brewers are interested in nothing more than making cheap beer, but that's no excuse to make worse swill than made by the mass-producers. As i've found, some top-shelf ingredients can make beer magically better for virtually no more effort apart from simply buying the stuff.
Anyway, i will be posting about how my various efforts have turned out, but will try and avoid the inane updates of how the stuff smells in the fermenter and other twitter-like asininity.
And the best part of making beer? Well, duh! Now that i mention it, where did i put my bottle?
What ultimately dawned on me was that the quality of the beer is due in most part to the quality of its ingredients. That home brewed beer is much cheaper than the swill, er, commercial varieties, makes the idea of using premium ingredients all the more attractive. Of course, the cleanliness, the care and the temperature are all vitally important, but you still can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear (who was the fool who tried that?).
And of course, KISS: keep it simple, stupid! (refer to Exhibit A - the aforementioned orange beer).
Of course, i realised that i could not compete with the extreme brewers, but who wants to grow their own barley? I've tried semi-mash brewing, but to my chagrin i've found that it simply represents more opportunity to screw things up. Sure, it can make your beer fresher, but for a lot more work. The simple fact is, a lot of home brewers are interested in nothing more than making cheap beer, but that's no excuse to make worse swill than made by the mass-producers. As i've found, some top-shelf ingredients can make beer magically better for virtually no more effort apart from simply buying the stuff.
Anyway, i will be posting about how my various efforts have turned out, but will try and avoid the inane updates of how the stuff smells in the fermenter and other twitter-like asininity.
And the best part of making beer? Well, duh! Now that i mention it, where did i put my bottle?
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